MORE SUNDAY FUNNIES (repost)

How Saiful sharpens his pencils (forwarded by V.C.)

Time to send Ezam packing! (courtesy of Susan Loone & Wits)

Dickotine fix, anyone? Cock-tipped! (forwarded by V.C.)

[First posted 18 January 2009]

ENEMIES OF TRUTH AND JUSTICE! (updated & revisited)

Abdul Gani Patail, the slimiest Attorney-General Malaysia has had to endure 
(at least until Mohamed Apandi Ali took over!)

Look at these faces closely, folks. Some you already know, only too well - like the Famous Anus pictured right, pretending piety while oozing semen and lying through every orifice...

A few you wouldn't recognize even if they were sitting next to you on the train. If overzealous investigating officer DSP Jude Blacious Pereira (below, left) wasn't in uniform, would you recognize him on the street? Why are the Malaysian police going all out to convict one guy for "consensual sex" - while thousands of serious crimes, including the cold-blooded murder of foreign nationals, continue to remain unsolved?

They all have one thing in common: their involvement in the obscene plot to put Anwar Ibrahim back behind bars over a nonsensical charge of sodomy - in the hope that with Anwar locked away, the opposition coalition called Pakatan Rakyat will lose its impetus to replace Barisan Najis as the government of the day in Malaysia.

The statutes against anal and oral sex are a relic of Victorian era colonial rule. Whereas in Britain these statutes have long fallen into disuse and died a natural death, in Malaysia they have been dusted off and abused, twice, to persecute one particular individual - a charismatic political figure named Anwar Ibrahim, whose greatest crime was to challenge the extended dictatorial reign of Mahathir Mohamad, who became prime minister in 1981 and only stepped down on 31 October 2003 under pressure from his political party, Umno.

Anwar Ibrahim has the dubious distinction of being the only Malaysian to be publicly humiliated by accusations of pederasty, and forced to endure tortuous and twisted mock trials presided over by kangaroo judges - like the late unlamented Augustine Paul; the gormless Zabidin Mohd Diah (who redeemed himself by acquitting Anwar on 9 January 2012); and the grand inquisitorial Bahia Yusof Wahi (pictured left, who presided over the Court of Appeals' farcical decision to find Anwar guilty on 7 March 2014 and sentence him to 5 years' imprisonment - in what was clearly seen as a political maneuver executed in unholy haste to disqualify Anwar from standing for an important by-election scheduled on 23 March).

Anwar had been imprisoned for 6 years in 1999 and an insidious attempt was made on his life while serving out his sentence through gradual arsenic poisoning. All this occurred under Mahathir Mohamad's watch - and the same old shit is happening again to Anwar Ibrahim under Najib Razak's insufferable crime ministership.

Dr Seah Lay Hong, government forensic chemist, seems less concerned with the truth 
than keeping her job...

And we the public seem capable of only watching this perverse abuse of the law and shaking our heads in utter disbelief.

Shafee Abdullah, appointed  DPP,
demanded an even stiffer jail term

We owe it to ourselves - and our own posterity - to stop this gross mockery of rule of law and massive insult to our intelligence. The fact that the Attorney-General insisted on appealing Anwar's acquittal  - and even appointed a freelance mercenary to lead the prosecution - reveals the unmitigated malice with which the federal government has pressed for a conviction that would effectively take the Opposition Leader off the political gameboard. Not satisfied with a 5-year prison term, the prosecution is hell-bent on demanding a harsher sentence.

Saiful the Accuser stated in open court that he had visited the then deputy prime minister, Najib Razak, and his flamboyant wife Rosmah Mansor, at their private residence a couple of days before lodging a police report against Anwar. Najib himself was forced to admit as much during a press conference on 3 July 2008. This fact alone is enough to cast an opague shadow of serious doubt over the entire political charade.

If we allow this illustrious son of Malaysia, Anwar Ibrahim, to be imprisoned again for a completely anachronistic "crime" - and it's absolutely irrelevant whether or not the accusation leveled against him has any basis whatsoever - then we as citizens of this nation fully deserve to be mentally shackled, morally deformed, and condemned to neverending BN mismanagement unto forever.

Najib Razak and his spendthrift spouse Rosmah Mansor: 
Goodbye... begone... and please don't come back!

[First posted 22 February 2011, reposted 30 October 2014]

FLASHBACK TO AUGUST 2008: UMNO'S HOUSE OF HORRORS (revisited)

RIGHT: Pin-up shot of Saiful Bukhari in a baseball cap that has been circulating the internet; Pederasts Anonymous have expressed Socratic interest in this promising young man and invited him to be their mascot

SAIFUL BUKHARI BIN AZLAN ON MALAYSIAKINI:

"I swore in the name of Allah at the Federal Territory Mosque this evening in accordance to the teachings of Islam and as advised by religious scholars and teachers that I was sodomised by Anwar Ibrahim."

What is Saiful saying? Islam teaches people to swear in the name of Allah (whose own credibility, credentials, and existence have yet to be established to everybody's satisfaction) whenever accused of any behavior deemed to be an offence? Any boy as pretty as Saiful will have had a long history of being "hit on" by males as well as females. By the age of 23 he ought to have learnt how to accept or refuse such erotic advances. To now claim he was forcibly sodomized by a 61-year-old man with a bad back defies belief - unless he was drugged and raped, which is a whole different scenario. Anyone who has ever attempted penetration of a tight anus will attest that this is virtually impossible without the the acquiescence, consent and wholehearted cooperation of the person to whom the anus belongs.

Penetration by force would result in tissue damage, bleeding and scarring easily detectable by even a cursory rectal examination - and we already have the sworn testimony of the good Burmese doctor at Hospital Pusrawi that no such signs of forced entry were discovered. Apparently a subsequent rectal examination of Saiful Bukhari at Hospital Kuala Lumpur also confirmed that there were no signs of forced entry. Saiful can swear on every book in the world till he's blue in the face - but that won't alter the results of the rectal examinations. Unless, of course, Saiful has an extremely accommodating and elastic anus that allows him to be sodomized by a rogue elephant and still show no physical signs.

Alpha blogger Raja Petra Kamarudin has disclosed on Malaysia Today: "At 2.30pm on Wednesday, 25 June 2008, Senior Assistant Commissioner (SAC) II Mohd Rodwan Mohd Yusof (shown right in a 1998 file picture) met Mohd Saiful Bukhari Azlan in room 619 of the Concorde Hotel in Kuala Lumpur. Prior to this secret meeting, Rodwan and Saiful spoke on the phone at least eight (8) times."

Now this is an extremely detailed disclosure which suggests that somebody within the police force is extremely unhappy with the dirty business at hand and has chosen to be RPK's "Deep Throat." I didn't hear any reporters questioning Saiful at yesterday's press conference about his connection with SAC Rodwan Yusof (who has been accused of helping Musa Hassan falsify evidence against Anwar Ibrahim in the 1998 sodomy allegation instigated by Mahathir). No doubt Saiful would have replied: "I will answer that in court later."

"The oath I've taken was done voluntarily and it was done to uphold the truth as a Muslim, a Malay and a Malaysian."

Saiful Bukhari sees himself as primarily a Muslim, then a Malay, and lastly a Malaysian. I'm sorry, Saiful, but being any of those doesn't add any credence whatsoever to your oath. The Umno chaps all claim to be Muslim, Malay, and Malaysian - and that has never stopped them from lying through every orifice just to cling on to power.

"I understand that if the allegations and oath that I've taken under the name of Allah are not true, I will be cursed by God and tragedy and curse will come upon my family and the generations after me forever."

Even if God lets you off light, Saiful, you can bet your arse you will be spat at and shunned by a lot of people for stooping so low just for a bit of cheap publicity and a "scholarship" from Umno. But please leave your fiancée out of this curse business - I'm sure she had no idea what she was in for. Curse your father (pictured right), if you like; he looks like someone already accursed.

"I've taken this oath to prove that my allegations are completely true. This is the best way for me to attain justice in the world and the hereafter and for me to redeem my pride and dignity as Allah is the only place where I can complain to."

Load of crap, boy! Taking that oath on the Qur'an proves only one thing: you're convinced that other Muslims will be inclined to believe you're telling the truth, and that's what this evil game is really about - to poison the minds of Muslim-Malay voters against Anwar Ibrahim, the greatest threat Umno has ever faced in its entire history. And if you truly feel Allah is your recourse, why did you bother going for a rectal examination at Hospital Pusrawi before lodging a police report on 28 June as instructed by your Umno handlers?

"I've done this for God and I took my oath in the house of God, that I was humiliated and sodomised by Anwar Ibrahim and I do not wish to lie to the world as he has done."

You twisted little shit, Saiful! Umno is NOT God! You've been offered filthy lucre to "sacrifice yourself" to save Umno from Anwar Ibrahim - and you saw a golden opportunity to attain global notoriety as Anwar's political assassin - exactly like Mark David Chapman believed he would forever be remembered as the fuckwit who shot John Lennon.

Saiful, an omniscient, omnipotent, and omnipresent God would already know what a "good" boy you are (no need for you to sumpah on the Qur'an, that's only for show); an all-powerful God would have intervened to protect your chastity from being ravaged. God the omnipresent also resides in your anus and, for all we know, probably relishes the occasional rectal probe!


[First published 16 August 2008, reposted 22 September 2011]

Saiful to answer charges of "qazaf" (reprise)

At 11AM today (27 November 2008) Saiful Bukhari Azlan, who lodged a police report 28 June 2008 that he had been anally raped by Anwar Ibrahim, presented himself at the Federal Territory Islamic Religious Department (JAWI) for further questioning with regard to Anwar's formal complaint on 9 July 2008 that Saiful Bukhari had committed qazaf (wrongfully accusing a chaste man or woman of adultery or homosexuality without four reliable witnesses).

The punishment for those who accuse others of committing adultery and sodomy without substantiation is, according to various Islamic scholars, similar to those who commit such offences.

HERE'S A POINT-BY-POINT SUMMARY OF SALIENT FACTS SURROUNDING THIS PERPLEXING AND SORDID AFFAIR THAT HAS MADE MALAYSIA THE BUTT OF ENDLESS ANUS JOKES:

1. Saiful Bukhari Azlan is reportedly Mumtaz Jaafar's "Godson."

2. Mumtaz Jaafar is reportedly Rosmah Mansor's business associate and "bag lady."

Mumtaz Jaafar (MJ) & Rosmah Mansor (RM) with a Wanita Umno group (from The Dandelions)

3. Najib Razak finally admitted (under pressure) that Saiful Bukhari had visited him and his wife at their residence "a few days" before Saiful lodged his infamous police report against Anwar Ibrahim. Najib had earlier stated that Saiful only visited his office and discussed getting a "scholarship" with Khairil Anas Yusof, "special aide" to DPM Najib. Initially, Najib insisted he had "never met" Saiful personally. Then MT published part of a video interview with a friend of Saiful Bukhari who attested he had accompanied Saiful on his visit to Najib & Rosmah's residence...

Saiful posing with Khairil Anas Yusof (special aide to Najib) at the Deputy Prime Minister's office in February 2008.

4. Malaysia Today also published a story stating that Saiful Bukhari had met Senior Assistant Commissioner (II) Mohd Rodwan Mohd Yusof in Room 619 of the Concorde Hotel at 2:30 PM on 25 June 2008 (3 days before the police report was lodged). The MT report also alleged that Saiful had been in phone contact with Rodwan Mohd Yusof and other police officers for several days prior to that rendezvous at the Concorde. Rodwan Mohd Yusof happens to be IGP Musa Hassan's "dirty tricks" agent and was involved in Anwar's 1998 sodomy trial (he demanded Anwar's DNA sample from the Hospital Besar KL which was later used on the infamous Tivoli mattress). To date there has been no official denial or investigation of these allegations. Rodwan Mohd Yusof had "no comment" when questioned by reporters.

5. Saiful Bukhari Azlan's biological father, Azlan Mohd Lazim, had abandoned Saiful's mother when Saiful was still a toddler. Recently, Azlan Mohd Lazim (seated beside Saiful, above) reappeared in Saiful's life when he accompanied his estranged son to the swearing ritual at the Federal Territory Mosque officiated by a newly appointed imam, Ramlang Porigi, on 15 July 2008 (one day before Nomination Day for the Permatang Pauh by-election). Azlan Mohd Lazim was also present at a press conference afterwards. It was subsequently revealed by MT that Azlan Mohd Lazim earns his living mainly as an Umno go-between, fixing deals and negotiating clandestine transactions, and was instrumental in coordinating the secret PAS-Umno meetings soon after 8 March 2008. Azlan Mohd Lazim is on a special committee of Umno entrepreneurs, headed by Romeli Musa (of Sapura Holdings) determined to stop Anwar Ibrahim from becoming PM and Pakatan Rakyat from taking over the federal government.

Click here for behind-the-scenes report on how PKR pulled off this remarkable coup.

6. During the Permatang Pauh by-election campaign, looped video footage of Saiful Bukhari swearing on the Koran that Anwar Ibrahim had forcibly sodomized him was repeatedly and almost continuously projected on giant outdoor screens at all BN operations centers. However, Ramlang Porigi, the imam who had officiated at Saiful's swearing ritual, showed up at PKR ceramahs & publicly stated that he was unwittingly and unwillingly dragged into the whole affair - in fact, Ramlang revealed that Khairil Anas Yusof ("special aide" to the DPM) had arranged the swearing ritual and that Ramlang himself had no say in the matter. He was bombarded with angry messages from friends and strangers afterwards and realized he had to come out in the open & officially disassociate himself from Saiful's swearing ritual.

7. Saiful Bukhari showed up at Hospital Pusrawi after lunch on 28 June 2008 complaining of acute pain in his own arse ("someone shoved some plastic object up my rectum..."). He was rectally examined by Dr Mohamed Osman Abdul Hamid who found no signs that Saiful Bukhari had been forcibly sodomized and said as much in his medical report. Subsequently, the Hospital Pusrawi report was leaked to the media (it first appeared in Malaysia Today, of course), and that made the entire case go limp. On 7 August 2008 Anwar Ibrahim was charged with "consensual" sodomy under Section 377B of the Penal Code, contradicting Saiful Bukhari's insistence under Koranic oath that he had not consented and was, in fact, raped by Anwar (believe it or not, Ripley!)

From Malaysiakini.tv, 4 Sept 2008

8. Dr Mohamed Osman Abdul Hamid subsequently read a statement at a press conference endorsing the authenticity of the leaked Hospital Pusrawi medical report and maintaining that he stood by the results of his rectal examination. Dr Osman also revealed that he had been repeatedly visited by police officers who made him sign statements in Malay which he did not fully understand (being a Burmese national) & which contained extraneous details added by the police.

As far as I'm concerned this case is closed, QED.

For Saiful Bukhari's protection (from possible attack by morally inflamed Anwaristas and ardent connoisseurs of plump young rumps) I recommend that the good Burmese doctor be assigned to bung up Saiful's pert little ass. However, if Dr Osman has already left the country - and who can blame him, after all the stress he's been subject to? - then we'll just have to hand Saiful over to that Honorable MP from Kenabatangan, Bung Mokhtar Radin (who's reputed to be quite an expert on bunging up leaky holes).

Kenny Gan (Letters to Malaysiakini): When Anwar’s trial begins, Saiful should be asked one question: ‘Does he agree to the charge under Section 377B of consensual sodomy?’ If he still insists as per his public stance that the act was non-consensual, the charge should be amended to Section 377C covering non-consensual sodomy or be thrown out.

This is more than a technical definition. Section 377C involves an element of force which must be proven and hence it is much more difficult to obtain a conviction given the facts of the case. There are no two ways about it. The prosecution cannot give themselves an easier job to convict Anwar for consensual sodomy while the witness denies it. For Anwar’s case to proceed under the present charge, Saiful must be willing to repudiate his public stance of forced sodomy and take the adverse repercussions given his swearing on the Quran. Otherwise, it must be amended to Section 377C. Anything else is a gross miscarriage of justice.

Check out this BONUS FEATURE on BEAUTIFUL ANUSES!

[First posted 27 November 2008]

A Closer Look At Anuses (revisited)

Extreme closeup of Umno's anus at 9:09 a.m. on 9 March 2008, after the party was sodomized by the Malaysian electorate. (Image courtesy of WritinMan)

This is how PUS... I mean PAS looked to the Malaysian electorate the morning after they discussed 'Islam and Malay Unity' in bed with Umno.

Saiful Bukhari's anus after Malaysiakini published Dr Mohamed Osman Abdul Hamid's report on its unravished condition.


MY LADY HAS A BEAUTIFUL ANUS

By John Kluivert

July 18, 2001

How do I love my lady's anus? Let me count the ways.

Have you seen her? Have you seen my beautiful lady and her anus? Unless you are an ex-boyfriend, her proctologist, or an art student in that class she modeled for, you probably have not have glimpsed the fairest orifice on God's green Earth. For this, you have my deepest sympathies.

I would put my lady's anus up against any of the legendary anuses of the past: Helen of Troy, Joan of Arc, Marie Curie, Eleanor Roosevelt. Even Cleopatra, who, according to legend, had a team of eunuchs apply balms and liniments with silken cloths to keep her anus and inner rectum immaculate, could not stand up to my lady. (My lady needs no such fripperies to be beautiful... though I do not hesitate to lavish them on her.) Lovely as Cleopatra's anus may have been, compared to my lady's, hers is a pustulent, lesion-ravaged hole.

My lady does not like me to go on and on about her anus, but how can I resist? When I look into that one brown eye, it's like gazing into a deep, untouched lake. Sometimes, it's as if I'm gazing through a taut, puckered window into her very soul, placing myself in danger of being hypnotized by the swirls of her rectum. Her anus is like a vessel I can't seem to fill with enough love, no matter how hard I try. I am not what one would call a holy man, but when I am gently kissing my lady's fragrant anus, I am convinced that there must be a higher power out there who made this sacred aperture.

As I am very protective of my lady's anus, few have seen it. Nevertheless, I am fond of waxing rhapsodic on its beauty. This can be difficult, though, for how does one describe the beauty of a Tuscan moon? How does one tell of the glory of the cosmos? Shakespeare would have written sonnets about it. Beethoven would have discarded his "Ode To Joy" in favor of "Ode To My Lady's Anus." And Raphael would have tried–and failed–to render its essence in oils. Lo, prodigious as these immortals' artistic gifts were, my lady's anus would have proven too elusive a muse for any of them to capture.

Yes, my lady's anus is a sight to behold. But it is not just a question of looks. For all its aesthetic loveliness, the greatest thing about my lady's anus is its personality. Sometimes silly, sometimes sad; sometimes dilated, sometimes clenched, it reveals a new wrinkle every time we meet.

Whether I see it reflected in candlelight during a romantic dinner or after it has just awakened from a night's slumber, my lady's anus is still as lovely to me as the first time I saw it. My friends say I won't feel the same way about it when it's 60. I disagree. It may lose that youthful glow, but this is the kind of anus that will only ripen with age. As further assurance, I once caught a glimpse of my lady's mother's anus and, as we all know, the apple does not fall far from the tree.

People say I'm spoiling my lady's anus by buying imported, hand-woven silk toilet paper. But do you polish a diamond with sandpaper? Do you restore the Mona Lisa with a hammer? My lady's anus deserves ruby and emerald enemas. Swabs of cotton soaked in the finest champagne. Anything less would be woefully inadequate for an orifice of such sublime beauty.

And don't even get me started on her perineum.


And now, an exclusive report from Down Under...

GETTING TO THE BOTTOM OF AN UNWHOLESOME OBSESSION

March 23, 2005

HEARD of sphincter bleaching? Beauticians are billing it as the new Brazilian wax. "In the last couple of months I've had a lot of requests, so I've started some experiments," says Sydney beautician Anna Marsiano from The Bees' Knees salon.

"I've got one client who's a divorced woman with a couple of kids. She was looking at a Playboy magazine with her new boyfriend and he was making some comments about how clean and light the women looked. My client started to get a little paranoid."

Marsiano says she uses a herbal brand popular in the Philippines as a facial whitener. It is applied to the dark pigmentation around women's rectums as well as to their vaginal areas. Marsiano says the product does not damage the skin and has "rejuvenating" properties.

But another Sydney beautician, asked about her anal lightening equipment, produces a completely different product altogether. It's a cream that clearly states it is designed to be used on hair. This beautician has treated sex workers and strippers for years, but says mainstream demand has risen sharply over the past six months. She acknowledges that her long-term clients (many of whom come in for treatments every six weeks) suffer serious skin problems. "I explain that it will give them eczema and so on, but they want it anyway," she says.

Hard-line feminists will no doubt respond with an outraged "What will the misogynist patriarchy do to us next?" (possibly staging some sort of "reclaim the date" march). The cosmetic entrepreneurs, meanwhile, are bound to capitalise on the controversy by selling DIY backdoor bleaching kits (possibly along the lines of the personalised mouth moulds provided for teeth whitening).

As with all debates about society's relentless pursuit of beauty, however, the answer to "how much is too much?" is hard to ascertain.

The good news on sphincter bleaching is that it's safer than anything involving general anaesthetics or fat-vacuuming gizmos. The bad news is that you could be in for a lifetime of skid marks. The chairwoman of the Australian Medical Association's ethics committee, Rosanna Capolingua, says the use of harsh bleaching substances could cause anal burning and scarring. This, in turn, could lead to anal incontinence or an inability to pass stools at all.

Sound attractive? If the figures in the cost and reward equation don't add up, perhaps it's worth giving the bleach a miss and locating a lover who doesn't expect your bum to look like Barbie's.

NATIONAL ASSHOLES
(Unretouched photos from the archive)

 

    [First posted 28 July 2008. Updated 23 November 2015]                                                                          

UMNO'S HOUSE OF HORRORS (Part Three)

(Photo courtesy of Howsy)

NAJIB: UP TO MUSLIMS TO DECIDE ON SAIFUL'S ACTION

"According to our system, any individual accused of sodomy can clear his name the Islamic way or through the courts and Saiful has chosen the former. It is up to the people to make their own conclusions.

"I have said from the beginning that this issue is a personal matter between Saiful and Anwar and has nothing to do with the Barisan Nasional," Najib told reporters after meeting Umno's Permatang Pauh by-election machinery in Butterworth yesterday.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Come on, Najib, you gotta do better than that if you seriously intend to try your hand at stand-up comedy after your parole. So, the whole sleazy sodomy affair is, by your own admission, only a sandiwara (puppet show) to dissuade Malay voters from voting against Umno? In effect, it has EVERYTHING to do with Barisan Nasional's desperate fight for survival. The very fact that you were quoted right after you chaired an Umno meeting on the Permatang Pauh by-election makes your statement reek even stronger. If the entire matter were strictly "a personal matter" between Saiful and Anwar, why would every Umno big gun be making stupid, self-incriminating remarks about the ridiculous allegations? From the home minister to the deputy prime minister and even the prime minister himself - all of you have seen fit to stick your fat necks out "to ensure Saiful gets justice." How laudable... I mean, laughable!

Many of us got suckered into believing at first that you, Najib Razak, were personally responsible for orchestrating this pigheaded plot to fix Anwar. After all, you publicly admitted to having given "counsel" to Saiful Bukhari in your own house just before he lodged that mischievous police report. However, our best source of political gossip, Raja Petra Kamarudin, gleefully informs us that the real mastermind behind Sodomy II is Umno legal adviser Shafee Abdullah (pictured left).

Now that Shafee has been fingered and exposed, the police black ops against Anwar will have been scuttled - hence the decision to appeal to Malay sentiments by getting Saiful to swear on the Qur'an that Anwar Ibrahim forcibly sodomized him. What exquisite timing - right on the eve of nomination day for the Permatang Pauh by-election! Oooh, I can just picture a motley bunch of besongkoked Umno conspirators huddled together in secret conference rooms, drinking kopi-O kau and plotting and scheming Anwar's downfall...

Another influential blogger who calls himself Tulang Besi (Iron Bones) pinpoints Abdullah Badawi's detestable son-in-law and his fatcat capitalist cronies in the media as the ones responsible for this ill-conceived attempt to smear and neutralize both Anwar and Najib with a single scandal. Stands to reason, no prizes for guessing which smirking, slimy jerk once boasted he intends to be PM by the age of 40...

Not a hope in hell, Khairy!

[First posted 16 August 2008]

UMNO'S HOUSE OF HORRORS (Part One)

RIGHT: Pin-up shot of Saiful Bukhari in a baseball cap that has been circulating the internet; Pederasts Anonymous have expressed Socratic interest in this promising young man and invited him to be their mascot

SAIFUL BUKHARI AZLAN ON MALAYSIAKINI:

"I swore in the name of Allah at the Federal Territory Mosque this evening in accordance to the teachings of Islam and as advised by religious scholars and teachers that I was sodomised by Anwar Ibrahim."

What is Saiful saying? Islam teaches people to swear in the name of Allah (whose own credibility, credentials, and existence have yet to be established to everybody's satisfaction) whenever accused of any behavior deemed to be an offence? Any boy as pretty as Saiful will have had a long history of being "hit on" by males as well as females. By the age of 23 he ought to have learnt how to accept or refuse such erotic advances. To now claim he was forcibly sodomized by a 61-year-old man with a bad back defies belief - unless he was drugged and raped, which is a whole different scenario. Anyone who has ever attempted penetration of a tight anus will attest that this is virtually impossible without the the acquiescence, consent and wholehearted cooperation of the person to whom the anus belongs.

Penetration by force would result in tissue damage, bleeding and scarring easily detectable by even a cursory rectal examination - and we already have the sworn testimony of the good Burmese doctor at Hospital Pusrawi that no such signs of forced entry were discovered. Apparently a subsequent rectal examination of Saiful Bukhari at Hospital Kuala Lumpur also confirmed that there were no signs of forced entry. Saiful can swear on every book in the world till he's blue in the face - but that won't alter the results of the rectal examinations. Unless, of course, Saiful has an extremely accommodating and elastic anus that allows him to be sodomized by a rogue elephant and still show no physical signs.

Alpha blogger Raja Petra Kamarudin has disclosed on Malaysia Today: "At 2.30pm on Wednesday, 25 June 2008, Senior Assistant Commissioner (SAC) II Mohd Rodwan Mohd Yusof (shown right in a 1998 file picture) met Mohd Saiful Bukhari Azlan in room 619 of the Concorde Hotel in Kuala Lumpur. Prior to this secret meeting, Rodwan and Saiful spoke on the phone at least eight (8) times."

Now this is an extremely detailed disclosure which suggests that somebody within the police force is extremely unhappy with the dirty business at hand and has chosen to be RPK's "Deep Throat." I didn't hear any reporters questioning Saiful at yesterday's press conference about his connection with SAC Rodwan Yusof (who has been accused of helping Musa Hassan falsify evidence against Anwar Ibrahim in the 1998 sodomy allegation instigated by Mahathir). No doubt Saiful would have replied: "I will answer that in court later."

"The oath I've taken was done voluntarily and it was done to uphold the truth as a Muslim, a Malay and a Malaysian."

Saiful Bukhari sees himself as primarily a Muslim, then a Malay, and lastly a Malaysian. I'm sorry, Saiful, but being any of those doesn't add any credence whatsoever to your oath. The Umno chaps all claim to be Muslim, Malay, and Malaysian - and that has never stopped them from lying through every orifice just to cling on to power.

"I understand that if the allegations and oath that I've taken under the name of Allah are not true, I will be cursed by God and tragedy and curse will come upon my family and the generations after me forever."

Even if God lets you off light, Saiful, you can bet your arse you will be spat at and shunned by a lot of people for stooping so low just for a bit of cheap publicity and a "scholarship" from Umno. But please leave your fiancée out of this curse business - I'm sure she had no idea what she was in for. Curse your father (pictured right), if you like; he looks like someone already accursed.

"I've taken this oath to prove that my allegations are completely true. This is the best way for me to attain justice in the world and the hereafter and for me to redeem my pride and dignity as Allah is the only place where I can complain to."

Load of crap, boy! Taking that oath on the Qur'an proves only one thing: you're convinced that other Muslims will be inclined to believe you're telling the truth, and that's what this evil game is really about - to poison the minds of Muslim-Malay voters against Anwar Ibrahim, the greatest threat Umno has ever faced in its entire history. And if you truly feel Allah is your recourse, why did you bother going for a rectal examination at Hospital Pusrawi before lodging a police report on 28 June as instructed by your Umno handlers?

"I've done this for God and I took my oath in the house of God, that I was humiliated and sodomised by Anwar Ibrahim and I do not wish to lie to the world as he has done."

You twisted little shit, Saiful! Umno is NOT God! You've been offered filthy lucre to "sacrifice yourself" to save Umno from Anwar Ibrahim - and you saw a golden opportunity to attain global notoriety as Anwar's political assassin - exactly like Mark David Chapman believed he would forever be remembered as the fuckwit who shot John Lennon.

Saiful, an omniscient, omnipotent, and omnipresent God would already know what a "good" boy you are (no need for you to sumpah on the Qur'an, that's only for show); an all-powerful God would have intervened to protect your chastity from being ravaged. God the omnipresent also resides in your anus and, for all we know, probably relishes the occasional rectal probe!

[First posted 16 August 2008]

901: a significant turning point in Malaysian history....

Anwar pledges to topple BN after acquittal
January 09, 2012


KUALA LUMPUR, Jan 9 — Datuk Seri Anwar Ibrahim said today that “justice has been served” after his acquittal in a politically-charged sodomy trial and pledged to topple the ruling Barisan Nasional (BN) in the next elections.

“Thank God, justice has been served. I feel vindicated but we still have a struggle. We have to now focus on the general election,” he told reporters after the High Court here acquitted and discharged him of a charged of sodomising his former male aide Mohd Saiful Bukhari Azlan in 2008.

Wan Azizah hugs her hubby Anwar Ibrahim immediately after the judge acquitted him
(photo tweeted by Nurul Izzah Anwar)

Somebody just shit his pants...

Rosjib, the artificial intelligence
inserted into the hologram to siphon off
the wealth of the nation

Judge allows defence to quiz PM, Rosmah

By Hafiz Yatim

Malaysiakini | Aug 8, 2011 | 10:06am

Opposition Leader Anwar Ibrahim scored a significant morale boosting victory today when the High Court said that the prosecution must ensure the attendance of its witnesses who are to be interviewed by the defence team.

Justice Mohamad Zabidin Mohd Diah said since the witnesses are offered by the prosecution (after Anwar was ordered to make his defence on the Sodomy II charge), as such, it is their responsibility to ensure they attend the interview session.

"However, it depends on the witnesses if they want to say anything in the interview. Hence, I am allowing both the defence applications," Justice Zabidin said.

Solicitor-general II Mohd Yusof Zainal Abiden had earlier submitted in court that Prime Minister Najib Abdul Razak, his wife, Rosmah Mansor, and former inspector-general of police Musa Hassan and former Malacca police chief Mohd Rodwan Mohd Yusof would only come forward if they were subpoenaed.

With today's ruling it is compulsory for the prosecution to ensure that the witnesses are brought to court to be interviewed by the defence team. All this must be done before next Monday. 

[Source: Malaysiakini]

Musa Hassan, ex-Police Inspector General, also just shit his pants....
Hey, this wasn't in the script!

Nominated Stupidest Judge in History

Mohamad Zabidin Mohd Diah, presiding judge in the bizarre and hilarious mock trial of Opposition Leader Anwar Ibrahim, has been nominated "The Stupidest Judge in History."

His Dishonorable Stupidness Zabidin Mohd Diah has THRICE refused to recuse himself, despite having displayed glaring bias against the defendant, who stands accused of consensual sodomy with accuser Saiful Bukhari Azlan - even though the initial police report lodged by Saiful Bukhari unequivocally states that Anwar Ibrahim raped him "more than eight times."

There is a vast difference between rape and consensual sex. Rape involves using criminal force to violate another against his or her will. Consensual sex implies that both were willing partners. In most mature countries consensual sex between consenting adults is NOT considered an offence, regardless of gender. However, in Malaysia, a 19th century edict prohibiting "sex against the natural order" has been dusted off twice - first in 1998, and again in 2008 - and used as a political weapon to thwart the career of the same individual, Anwar Ibrahim - whose only real crime is that he represents the aspirations of Malaysian voters to topple the corrupt, greedy and arrogant 54-year reign of Barisan Nasional.

As far as I know, no other Malaysian has ever been charged with sodomy and sentenced to nine years' imprisonment. The maximum sentence is 20 years, including six strokes of the rotan. In this day and age, attempting to enforce such an archaic law is beyond stupid. It reeks of unmitigated malice and political vengeance.

Accuser Saiful Bukhari Azlan has revealed himself to be a psychotic personality, basking in the glow of unflattering publicity and widespread unpopularity. The fact that he served as Anwar Ibrahim's personal aide for several months and voluntarily resigned just before filing a police report reveals him to be a Mark David Chapman wannabe (Chapman gained international infamy by assassinating his hero John Lennon on 8 December 1980).

Saiful Bukhari happens to be the godson of Mumtaz Jaafar, a close confidante of Rosmah Mansor, who now bills herself the First Lady of Malaysia. This fact alone, in a sane and sound judicial context, would have confirmed Saiful Bukhari as an unreliable witness and automatically disqualified him as an accuser of Rosmah and her husband's biggest political threat, Anwar.

Saiful testified in court that prior to filing his police report on 28 June 2008, he had spoken on the phone with the then Inspector-General of Police Musa Hassan, following which he met Assistant Commissioner Rodhwan Mohd Yusof in a hotel room; and, subsequently, Saiful had visited deputy prime minister Najib Razak and Rosmah Mansor at their residence. Musa Hassan has since stepped down as IGP, while Rodhwan Mohd Yusof has been promoted to Melaka Police Chief.

It must be noted at this point that Musa Hassan and Rodhwan Mohd Yusof were deeply involved in the 1998 sodomy charges against Anwar Ibrahim instigated by Mahathir Mohamad. With Anwar's conviction and imprisonment, Musa Hassan was eventually promoted to Top Cop, while Rodhwan Mohd Yusof continued as Musa Hassan's "dirty tricks" agent.

In effect, there is really no case against Anwar Ibrahim, even if one insists on questioning his personal sexual inclinations. Too many political connections surround the malicious accusation for it to be taken seriously.

Any judge possessing the minutest iota of intelligence and integrity - knowing that not only will his professional credibility be jeopardized, but the honor of his own ancestors and descendants as well - would have discreetly withdrawn from the case, even at the risk of being fired or bypassed for promotion. To knowingly subject oneself to being used as a political hand-puppet is not only demeaning to the person, it befouls the entire judiciary and throws justice itself into disrepute.

Zabidin "Justice My Foot" Mohd Diah, you have sentenced yourself - and your posterity - to eternal contempt and ridicule, a fate far worse than death.

Why don't you come clean? What secret dossier does Chief Justice Zaki Azmi have on you that gives him the power to force you into your present compromising and uncomfortable position?

If anyone can be accused of buggery, it is Mahathir Mohamad and Umno who sodomized the whole of Malaysia in 1988 when they destroyed the independence of the judiciary.

Zabidin Mohd Diah, in fact, is merely another "Saifool" in a vile and imbecilic political masquerade that has plunged Malaysia into the deepest, darkest pit of iniquity.

Azlan Mohd Lazim (above, right), Saiful Bukhari Azlan's estranged father, earns his living as an Umno go-between, fixing deals and negotiating clandestine transactions. He was instrumental in coordinating the secret PAS-Umno meetings soon after 8 March 2008. Azlan Mohd Lazim is on a special committee of Umno entrepreneurs, headed by Romeli Musa (of Sapura Holdings) determined to stop Anwar Ibrahim from becoming PM and Pakatan Rakyat from taking over the federal government.