ANOORA CHAPEK: Her Life & Times (by Antares)

Anoora Chapek in savage punk mode

In 1992 I relocated from KL to Pertak, Ulu Selangor, and lived by a wild mountain stream with the indigenous Temuan tribe as my nearest neighbors. There was a bamboo hut on the property that needed a new roof and floor and I chanced upon Anoora’s mother Indah Merkol and stepfather Rasid Aus fishing in a nearby stream.

They said they could help fix the hut and that’s how I got to know the whole family, because quite a few of them got involved in collecting bertam leaves for the roof and splitting bamboo for the floor. It took about eight days to get the roof and floor replaced. We threw a party to inaugurate the Official Residence of the Ceremonial Guardian of Magick River and that’s how we got to know our Temuan neighbors better.

The first time I visited Indah and Rasid in their village down the road, Anoora came to the door and when she saw me she turned and ran back inside the house. But on my second visit I had my SLR camera and all the kids crowded round to be photographed. Anoora, who was called Noor by her family, stood shyly apart and when I asked if she would like to be photographed too, she smiled and nodded.

Over the next few years I managed to gather more information about Noor Chapek. She was born 14 April 1971 at the Hospital Orang Asli Gombak and someone arbitrarily gave her the name Noorhayati binti Chapek, even though her parents were both Temuan and would have been horrified that their daughter had been issued a Muslim name. But they were illiterate and the Orang Asli Affairs Department had adopted a policy of encouraging Orang Asli to convert to Islam.

Her birth records indicate that she had hydrocephalus (water in the head) and appeared monstrous to her mother, who tried to sell her to one of the nurses. By the time the water in her skull was drained she had suffered a degree of cerebral damage. Since Indah was indifferent to the baby, her father Chapek Jalil decided to take the baby to his sister in Pahang for fostering. Indah and Chapek were not getting along and eventually separated – but not till they had produced one last child together, a boy named Atut. 

Indah with her hybrid grandson Ahau

After Chapek left her for another woman, Indah burnt her children’s birth certificates in anger, so when it came time for Anoora to get an identity card, the Orang Asli Affairs Department arbitrarily assigned her a random birthdate (4 June 1978), making her seven years younger than her true age. Her name was also shortened to Noor binti Chapek. She had contracted poliomyelitis when she was a toddler, just like her oldest brother Kasim, and they both ended up with a pronounced limp.

Intergenerational Pattern of Trauma

Indah Merkol had lost her parents at age 10, when her tribe was rounded up by British soldiers and forced to live in an Orang Asli encampment with a barbwire fence and sentries on 24-hour watch. The British Military Administration wanted the Orang Asli out of the jungle, so they could not supply Chin Peng’s guerrilla army with food. Hundreds of Orang Asli became depressed and succumbed to all manner of fatal diseases, and this is how Indah lost her parents. This is why Indah’s children never had much mothering and grew apart from her when they had their own families.

When I got engaged to Anoora, I asked her if she would mind my adding two extra A’s to her registered name, so that it would sound more melodious. The way her family pronounced the Arabic name “Noor” they made it sound more like “Noh.” Anoora seemed to like her extra A’s but her family started calling her “Norah” (unable to hear the difference the additional A’s made to her name). 

I learned that Anoora had flunked Primary One twice and after that she stopped attending school. Perhaps she was unable to put up with being bullied by other kids or being pressured by well-meaning but heavy-handed teachers. Anoora’s father Chapek decided to retrieve her from his sister’s home in Pahang and bring her back to live in Kuala Kubu Bharu, in Kampung Tun Abdul Razak, with his new wife Uman and her own children from a previous marriage. I don’t know what age she was when she was relocated to KKB. Probably when she had polio, but that’s just a guess. I visited Chapek and Uman in Kampung Tun Abdul Razak from time to time after he had a stroke and was no longer able to tend his huge durian plantation in Sungai Tua, near Batu Caves.

Chapek Jalil, his second wife Uman & one of their many grandchildren in
Kg Tun Abdul Razak, Kuala Kubu Bharu, a few years before his death in 2015.

Chapek Jalil, I learned, was descended from a bloodline that had been assigned the guardianship of Batu Caves – originally a Temuan sacred site associated with the legend of Nakhoda Si-Tanggang (which has in recent decades been co-opted as a Malay folk tale). As it turns out, a similar legend exists among many other indigenous tribes around Southeast Asia, warning against the arrogance that comes with elevated social status, causing us to despise our own humble origins.

On her mother’s side, I learned that the family totem was the dragon (naga). Anoora’s famous aunt, the celebrated Temuan ceremonial singer Minah Angong, often claimed that she could summon the dragon by singing a certain song to the river. Anoora’s late uncle Utat Merkol (who was married to two elf-maidens, called Orang Halus by the Temuan) once told me that I was married to the last of the tribal Dragonkeepers. Another uncle, Diap Ketum or Seri Pagi, was the last storyteller of the Temuan of Pertak.

Wedding photo by Lily Fu

When I met Indah and her third husband Rasid in 1992, Anoora had only recently moved in with her mother after living for years with her father in Kampung Tun Abdul Razak. This was decided after they realized she was susceptible to being lured into the bushes by smooth-talking young men during all-night wedding parties. Little did they know she would end up living with someone from an entirely different world.

Many have wondered (but never dared ask me) why I decided to marry Anoora Chapek. Her own mother believed that her daughter had been possessed by an elf-maiden who fell in love with me when I first arrived in this enchanted area. For my part, I only know that my heart spontaneously expanded when I met Anoora and learned about her difficult entry into the world and the travails of her childhood. I felt compelled to ensure that her later years would be pleasant and joyful beyond all expectations.

However, it was a long and arduous process, navigating the ego insecurity and pathological possessiveness she had inherited from Indah. There is a story to be told about how, in 2013, eighteen years after I wed Anoora in a 3-day tribal ceremony, Anoora began to liberate herself from the demon of self-destructive jealousy and slowly began to open her heart to everyone she met. 

A Species of Demonic Possession

Clairvoyant friends had informed me that a parasitic spirit had entwined itself around Anoora’s spine, feeding off the tribal rage, resentment and profound sorrow she had tapped into, accumulated over countless generations. It was a symbiotic bond between her and the parasite: it gave her enormous powers of endurance and obstinacy even as she fed the demon like a pet. On January 4th, 2013, with the help of two masterful spiritual healers, I performed remote psychic surgery on Anoora by visualizing the parasite as a crusty fungus-like tumor encasing part of her spine and carefully detaching it from her with an ultra-fine laser. It was far easier than expected and I distinctly “saw” the parasite getting dislodged and falling off her spine. 

Indah Merkol in September 2016

In our excitement we had completely forgotten to transmute and release the “dead” demon. Two days later Anoora complained of acute abdominal pain and I offered her some antacid tablets, which didn’t help. By the third day she was in such agony I rushed her to the clinic where the doctor scanned and x-rayed her abdomen. He was astonished to find Anoora’s lower gut completely infested with bacteria. He gave her a jab and some heavy-duty antibiotics and that put paid to the erstwhile parasite. After that she found it easier to break free of the jealousy programming.

Being absolutely illiterate and having grown up with a total lack of parental love and guidance, Anoora tended to channel her vitality in destructive, self-sabotaging ways, which made her the archetypal “wife from hell.” Two factors made me stick with her through thick and thin: firstly, I had vowed when I decided to marry Anoora that I would never leave her for another. And, secondly, I had grown a deep root in this heavenly location and nothing could persuade me to go back to urban living.

Anoora loves artistic mentor
Honey Khor (who doesn't?)

Seven years later, in August 2020, Honey Khor reappeared on the scene at the height of the “Covid” insanity and somehow got herself embedded in our humble hologram. She began to supply Anoora with art materials and gentle guidance and by early 2021 Anoora was happily applying acrylic paints on canvas – with remarkable results!

Not only is Honey a superb artist and art teacher, she also happens to have had vast experience working with “special needs” children and had recently embarked on a 4-year Master’s degree course in Art Therapy. Anoora grew intensely fond of “Teacher Honey” and began to look forward eagerly to her weekly visits. 

Honey Khor proved to be the natural facilitator of Anoora’s ultimate healing, by giving her a creative outlet for her childlike passion and a golden opportunity to feel genuinely proud of her own artistic accomplishments. 

Anoora was finally able to transmute her killjoy demon into a life-affirming daemon – a spirit in Greek mythology that serves to inspire art instead of illness

14 April 2023

Minah Angong (left), celebrated Temuan ceremonial singer, was Indah's elder sister

THE ALIEN VIRUS OF RELIGION: AN ANCIENT WAR ON CONSCIOUSNESS (repost)

By Karlos Kukulcan

So you thought you wanted enlightenment? Thought that life will be all peachy and smooth sailing when the veils of illusion were lifted? Those who have become ‘dis-illusioned’- and haven’t slid back into denial after seeing what was on the other side, or run in the opposite direction with their first taste of ‘enlightenment’ - realize that waking up is hard work.

So what is behind these veils of constructed reality, one might ask? To put it in succinct terms, what lies behind the social conditioning is this: “That our society is the product of an extraterrestrial race that moves and breathes—and even breeds—beneath the surface of all of human history.”

It’s much easier to fool people than to convince them that they have been fooled - such is the nature of confirmation bias and other psychological tools of manipulation. Breaking free of the ancient, historical 'constant' of mind control is an ongoing process of waking up out of a state of denial. Spiritual emergence and awakening involves a physiological break from the consensus social agreements of our planetary cult-ures. The realization that you have been fooled beyond belief can cause a great deal of inner turmoil to arise: utter dismay, a sense of humiliation, and a resulting backlash from friends and family who continually (and unconsciously) attempt to pull you back in line with the accepted "mainstream" groupthink. In this process of breaking free from of the enslavement of human consciousness, if you don’t have days where you completely question your sanity, I would suggest that you aren’t really waking up. Here is the only piece of advice that reflects the truth of this process: GET USED TO IT.

There is no use asking agents of the Matrix to validate the truth of your awakening, for you will only end up being diagnosed and medicated. You are simply becoming sane in an insane world. Now, more than ever, it is time for those who have already lifted these veils of deception to assist others who need the 'survival' band-aid ripped off quickly. A considerably-revised history lesson with regards to our true human origins is in order for the majority of humanity. Access the information, educate yourself, grab the sword of truth, and start swinging.

We must be willing to take a very direct look at what factors are inhibiting and obstructing our ability to see how the currently-implemented planetary paradigm has emerged from a history of violence, bloodshed and oppressive regimes. When we take this journey of discovery, what we will find is that the mechanism which has been (and still is) used to drive these agendas is the unsavory, unholy topic of RELIGION, and the manipulative God imposters lurking behind the many branches of this despotic tree.

We are dealing with mind programming, brainwashing, phantasms, and memes that have been so deeply embedded into the collective human psyche from epochs ago, that breaking free of them takes a considerable (and ongoing) effort. Not only must we dissociate ourselves from the daily distractions which are designed to keep us oblivious to the bigger picture, but we must be prepared to do the homework in order to discover our true human origins and the ongoing agenda of social control which suppresses that 'occulted' (hidden) truth.

If you have been born on this planet, then you are (to some degree or another) suffering the effects of a society that has become pathologically obedient to religious programming, and even those who break free from this tyrannical mechanism are oftentimes subsequently trained to become tolerant of all religions, rather than encouraged to clearly identify this dis-empowering phenomenon as being one of the main contributing factors to humanity's continuing enslavement.

It’s easy to become a target of accusations that involve loaded terms like “unloving” and “intolerant” when you pierce into the core of the foundational Mind Control virus known as RELIGION. One of the 20th century's most psychopathic dictators, "Chairman" Mao Zedong, coined the phrase 'political correctness' as a propaganda tool to train individuals into self-policing their thoughts and words - a far more effective method of keeping groups of people docile and subservient to the prevailing mind control directives than violent force and physical coercion. This social manipulation construct has become a powerful ally in counteracting the emerging groundswell of information and insights regarding the roots and impact of religious psychopathology - aiding and abetting a 'tyranny of context-free tolerance' that attempts to shame (and thereby silence) those who question the external authority-worshiping orthodoxy.

Most people on this planet have been born into their religious ideologies, and are so heavily addicted to the daily rituals that uphold their 'follower' identification (and unquestioning obedience to their religion) that they have little inclination towards actually questioning whether they have been fooled. For these "chosen faithful", their ego attachment with religious programming is reactive in design - they become easily offended when you bring into question the truth of their religion, the superiority of their particular flavor of “God”, and the validity of the written words within religious manuscripts. For many, it is actually a punishable offense to bring into question their “God”s eternal and unyielding authority.

Whenever this topic arises, there will be those who claim that other forms of cultural entrainment (which fall outside of the orthodox religion sphere) are somehow beyond the reach of separation consciousness corruption, being justified as ‘philosophies’ or ‘indigenous’ ways of knowing. However, the pathological program of obedience and the projection of authority outside of one's sovereign self is extended to all cults of 'belief'. The truth of these matters was understood by Siddhartha, who pleaded with those who were drawn to his perspective to avoid worshiping his being, creating idols out of his form, or transforming his insights into laws. And what has transpired as a result? The religion known as Buddhism, which would (of course) like to claim it is not a religion, and yet holds hundreds of millions of people in thrall to an idolized replica of this long-deceased man.

Every day, a large percentage of Buddhists ( throughout Asia in particular) get down on their knees and beg to the Buddha in the same way that the Christians beg to Jesus - this form of energy vampirism literally weakens the body's central nervous system. A person can practice kinesiology while gazing at a Buddha statue to confirm this fact. External forms of imposed discipline merely breeds disciples, rather than an autonomous, sovereign human Be-ing. The patriarchal program is as prevalent throughout Buddhism as it is in other religious denominations. There are numerous examples that can be used to highlight this reality - however, the most obvious may be to simply question when the Dalai Lama last incarnated as a woman, or when he next intends to do so? Siddhartha wound up becoming both an atheist and a vegetarian due to his extreme dissatisfaction with the endless blood sacrifices made to the “Gods” throughout the temples of his era.

If you want to check in with yourself about whether you are acting out of love or fear, then see how often you censor yourself from speaking about (and sharing) the truth regarding subjects that might challenge somebody else’s mind control conditioning, particularly when it comes to religion. Sharing the god-awful truth about religion is an act of love. It is a service to humanity. It is not a matter of being intolerant of people, nor has it anything to do with hatred, racism or bigotry. It is a matter of identifying the limiting religious programming running through the minds of humanity, which is acting like malware within the mainframe of human consciousness. If a computer has a virus running through it which is corrupting its operating system to the point of paralysis, you do not accuse it of being intolerant or a bigot - you simply identify the problem and install a program to clean out the virus.

“You have to understand that most people are not ready to be unplugged. And many of them are so inured, so hopelessly dependent on the system, that they will fight to protect it.” ~ Morpheus, 'THE MATRIX'

Religion is the false panacea that so many are hopelessly dependent upon, to the point where a fair number of adherents will LITERALLY fight to the death to defend their false ideological territory. Religion is a form of Stockholm Syndrome - defined as “Feelings of trust or affection felt in certain cases of kidnapping or hostage-taking by a victim toward a captor.” In the case of those taken hostage by religious ideology, their captors are the alien planetary overlords who have masqueraded as Gods upon Earth, and most of their victims are not even aware ‘who’ or ‘what’ has captured them. The same pantheon of brutal, psychopathic, militant, inbreeding, pedophile, reptilian being archetypes are found scattered throughout various religions and cultures on Earth, going by different names throughout the competing sects of this divisive cult: Islam, Christianity, Judaism, Hinduism, and on and on...a hierarchical 'murderer's row' of beings that have been 'cut and pasted' (with slight variations) into the tapestry of various religions down through the ages and amongst all cultures on Earth. These shadowy creatures are not simply the creative imaginings of a primitive people, nor can they be dismissed as mythological beings. And - crucially - they have not left.

Their ancient and ongoing genetic engineering operations continue to perpetuate the programs of division by playing upon ideas of racial superiority throughout the morphogenetic hive mind of humanity. This divisiveness is currently being stirred up to even-greater-than-usual degrees so as to further the agenda of the overlords - an agenda which includes totalitarian global governance and completely-open human servitude. The wars of these god impersonators are being played out through their pawns: humanity.

What we are currently seeing with the creation and funding of terrorist groups by alphabet agencies and corrupt Governmental regimes is the predetermined justification for total and endless warfare - and this is only the surface level reading of a much more sinister story.

They are not playing this game within timeframes and life spans that human beings could comprehend, and they are using religious belief in such nihilistic concepts as “End Times”, “The Revelation”, “Judgement Day”, "The Rapture" or the “Apocalypse” as a handbook, a road map and a user guide towards an “End Game” scenario, making it seem as though prophecy is being fulfilled in a totally irreversible way. Any 'face value' analysis of nationalistic political intrigue misses out on a far more fundamental gameplan: a gradual, directed process of rearranging the chess pieces on the board, all in service of bringing about 'unified' global governance.

“The bible tells us to be like God, and then on page after page it describes God as a mass murderer. This may be the single most important key to the behavior of Western Civilization” ~ Robert Anton Wilson

To be involved in a religion that idolizes an ancient prophet as “God’s” messenger - a human being who, as their own text records, is personally responsible for the beheadings of hundreds of people in an attempt to wipe out genetic lines in the name of God - is to embody that archetype of military thinking and behavior which accompanies it. There will be no peace found within such idolization. It would serve people's own state of sovereignty to start questioning what type of “God” would choose such an unfriendly and unsavory fellow to carry out his holy work on Earth?

Military training is another example of both Stockholm Syndrome and the nationalistic, racialist brainwashing whose roots are found within both patriarchal religious indoctrination and patriotic belief, perpetuating the agenda of control - Religion, Politics and Militarization always go hand in glove.

The wishful thinking of New Age believers (inspired by Eastern religious solipsism/reality bypassing programs) - and the spiritually/politically correct obedience puppets who are flying the flag of religious acceptance - would like the rest of us to believe that all religions share, at their core, a 'code' filled with “Spiritual Insights”. Perhaps it is supposed to be some type of ‘spiritual test’ to find such enlightening and uplifting insights hidden amongst the many and varied accounts of murderous, vengeful Gods who advocate religious terrorism, and who command the annihilation of cities, order the murder of children, demands the rape of virgin girls, afford no rights to women and who orders plagues and famines to afflict humankind with? When reading religious texts, it becomes fairly obvious that we are not dealing with an all-loving benevolent being here, but rather, we are seeing the shell game of off-planet impersonators who display every characteristic of a psychopath.

Far from promoting spiritual insights, religions are the breeding ground for conformity, psychopathy, and brainwashed militant fervor, playing upon the fear of death, punishment in the afterlife, and the salvation of those righteous believers who uphold “God’s” militant commands. These programs are designed to control and limit peoples mental faculties, modifying their behavior in the process. That is its function. Religion is a war on consciousness that was initiated in a time out of memory.

Every religion carries the seeds of division and hatred - at various times in his-story, a steady stream of various "faiths" have carried the water for the agenda of the god-impersonating off-planet, psychopathic overlords. It was only a few hundred years ago that millions of women in Europe were targeted and murdered after being accused by the Church of witchcraft. The psychic scarring that is carried within the genetic lineage of humanity's feminine principle as a result of patriarchal religious dominance is an ongoing global atrocity that serves to traumatize and disconnect individuals from the wisdom and guidance of this principle.

Poster by David Dees

It is becoming increasingly obvious that the events of the Problem/Reaction/Solution ritual of 9/11 were set in motion in order to use the orchestrated threat of terrorism to justify the invasion of many Middle Eastern countries, creating a power vacuum that would be filled by militant fundamentalism - thus setting off an emerging refugee crisis designed to destabilize other countries around the world so as to establish further global control ("security") courtesy of the New World Order.

Islam has been festering away in the middle east for a long time, and is now being systematically spread around the globe to areas ripe for hosting this parasitic virus of consciousness. There is no easier (or more brutally-effective) approach for this type of hidden orchestration than inducing and inflaming ethnic conflict fueled by religious indoctrination, and as always, the best way to control the opposition is to lead it.

These are all symptoms of a much deeper, older malignancy that has to do with the modification of the original human blueprint and the endocrine system that produces the chemical ratios that stabilize our individual and collective state of consciousness. When seen from this perspective, there is a cruel, inhuman irony when one considers that these otherworldly manipulators are now worshiped as 'saviors' (as part of the 'external salvation' fallacious meme), which is another prominent aspect of the religion pathology.

You have to pull out the roots of evil rather than simply hack away at the branches. Without looking at the origins of religious servitude, and clearly identifying who these God imposters (that have farmed humanity for eons) really are - and instead focusing on simply identifying and blaming previous and current corrupt governmental models - you are only seeing the puppets dance, oblivious to the marionette pulling the strings.

The Hebrew Bible story of human origins (known as the tale of Adam and Eve) is a false, misleading, and abbreviated version that was derived from a far more 'well-rounded' rendition that originated in ancient Sumerian cuneiform texts. These recollected Sumerian accounts describe a space-faring species, known as the “Annunaki”, who genetically modified the human race and used them as slaves.

To do some homework and further investigate this topic, research books such as:

Worldbridger by Juliet and Jiva Carter
Genesis Revisited by Zecharia Sitchin
Gods of the New Millennium by Alan Alford
DNA of the Gods by Chris Hardy
The Biggest Secret by David Icke
Slave Species of the Gods by Michael Tellinger
The Annunaki of Niburu by Gerald Clark

The solutions to the global crisis are not going to arise from the level of consciousness at which they are currently being generated. Tolerating religion is a band-aid, "feel good" solution over a rotting wound. We need to electromagnetically and neuro-chemically dissociate ourselves from the level of consciousness wherein these dualistic games are repeatedly being played out. The cumulative memory around religious servitude - built up within the collective consciousness and thus embedded into the morphic field of the planet - must be transcended. Only when we can collectively remove ourselves from that morphic resonance bandwidth (via the religion frequency) that is limiting our direct connection to source will we be able to embody the true benevolence of creation, as fractal aspects of co-creative consciousness.

"We are the ones we are waiting for. We don't need anyone to save us from the bullies in the playground. We need to resurrect and BECOME the BIO TECHNOLOGY we are." - Juliet Carter

Karlos Kukulcan served as an ambassador for “The Template”, a series of ceremonies that are a coded convergence of sound and sacred geometry, which - together with the revelations of Humanity’s origins, history and the full potential of the immortal Human design - initiates a powerful and transformative journey into the past, the ability to courageously be conscious and grounded in the present, and an understanding of the future which we will collectively co-create through the resurrection of the light body. He conducts workshop primarily throughout Australia, New Zealand and the USA. For more details visit his YouTube channel.

Editor/contributor: Tim McClew is a writer, editor, creative consultant and health product distributor who lives in Sydney, Australia. 

[First posted 26 November 2015, reposted 20 August 2016 & 19 March 2019]

Archie Kerr's famous note to Reggie Herbert (reprise)

Sir Archibald Clerk Kerr, British Ambassasor to Russia during WWII

The following note was written during the Second World War by the British Ambassador to Moscow, Sir Archibald Clerk Kerr, to Lord Pembroke of the Foreign Office. It was released under the Freedom of Information Act on 25 February 2000.

This is a truly excellent example of the masterful use of proper syntax in letter writing, and explains how Britain was able to colonize half the world and extend her cultural, economic and political influence across the centuries without having to miss more than an occasional tea break. This is also another damn good reason why every civilized nation must replace its Official Secrets Act with a Freedom of Information Act...

H. M. EMBASSY

MOSCOW

Lord Pembroke
The Foreign Office

LONDON

6th April 1943

My Dear Reggie,

In these dark days man tends to look for little shafts of light that spill from Heaven. My days are probably darker than yours, and I need, my God I do, all the light I can get. But I am a decent fellow, and I do not want to be mean and selfish about what little brightness is shed upon me from time to time. So I propose to share with you a tiny flash that has illuminated my sombre life and tell you that God has given me a new Turkish colleague whose card tells me that he is called Mustapha Kunt.

We all feel like that, Reggie, now and then, especially when Spring is upon us, but few of us would care to put it on our cards. It takes a Turk to do that.

Sir Archibald Clerk Kerr,
H.M. Ambassador

[First posted 14 July 2009. Kindly brought to my attention by Pat Goh... and for sure, Archie, I know exactly how you feel! Reposted 7 March 2016]

Dean Johns does it yet again! You've GOT to read this one, folks...

The BNality of evil
Dean Johns | Malaysiakini | 27 May 2009

On this glorious autumn morning in Sydney, an absolute cliché of a perfect day, the air as clear as crystal and the sky a stunning blue.

By rights I should be revelling in the feeling that it’s great just to be alive. And I guess I am, in a physical sense.

But emotionally it’s another matter entirely, as with this column to write, I sit here cheerlessly confronting the cold eye of my computer screen and its mindlessly blinking cursor, struggling to strike a spark of inspiration from an uncooperative keyboard.

But I can hardly blame an innocent computer for the contrast between the brilliance of the day and the bleakness of my mood. In fact the fault is entirely my own.

Somehow I’m constitutionally incapable of the feeling that ‘God’s in his heaven, all’s right with the world’ when the same alleged God that some imagine created this heavenly day perversely permits such hellish situations in so many other parts of the world.

Sometimes it seems that evil lurks almost everywhere on earth

There seems no end to the pain and suffering and death that it causes, and no sign that any amount of intervention, divine or otherwise, will ever diminish it, let alone bring it to an end.

And for those of us who are driven to write or fight against it, it has an extra and especially excruciating dimension: it’s incredibly, endlessly boring.

The phrase “the banality of evil” is as apt today as it was back when Hannah Arendt coined it to describe the personality of Nazi genocide organiser Adolf Eichmann.

Eichmann, she claimed, committed his atrocities not out of hatred for his victims, but out of a lack of imagination so total as to deprive him of any shred of empathy for fellow human beings.

I don’t believe that all of today’s major-league evil-doers are as motiveless as Eichmann, but they’re every bit as callous, banal and ultimately boring as he was in their insatiable cravings for power and feelings of self-importance.

Surely the most vivid embodiment of the banality of evil in the world today must be Kim Jong-Il (right) of North Korea. A man, like his father before him, who has enslaved and starved his people in his demented quest to maintain a million-strong army and build a nuclear weapon for the single, pathetic purpose of expressing his paranoid egomania.

Then there’s Robert Mugabe (left), driven by a hatred for whites that Eichmann, according to Arendt, lacked for the Jews he slaughtered, but every bit as empty as Eichmann of any capacity for sympathy or empathy with anyone but himself and the supporters he needs to survive.

And he is as boring as every other tinpot dictator I can think of in his greed for such banalities as grand mansions, branded merchandise and shopping sprees for his stupid wife.

The leaders of Iran are another case in point, still tediously employing timeless sectarian hatred and insane religious extremism in the pursuit of sordid, mundane cravings for some shred of self-esteem.

And so it goes around the globe, such an endless parade of banality and evil as to disgrace the human race and bore us columnists - and our unfortunate readers - to tears.

Beyond banality

Of course the most crying shame of all to me, because I happen to read and write about it so much, is the chronically tedious situation in Malaysia. After more than half a century of monopolisation by Barisan Nasional (BN), the situation has gone way beyond banality to utter BNality, and seems to get more evil by the day.

The whole country is held to ransom by a bunch of people so BNal that all they can muster in the way of a slogan for a nation they’ve so strenuously kept divided all these years is a ludicrous lie like ‘1Malaysia.’

And all these so-called leaders seem to care about are BNalities like money, ridiculous titles, luxury cars, big houses, offshore holiday retreats and overseas junkets for themselves and their families.

The BNality of evil; the evil of BNality. Have you ever heard or read an utterance by a BN politician that wasn’t so dim, dull or such a litany of obfuscation and outright lies that it was anything but stupefyingly boring?

And no, fans of Dr Mahathir Mohamad (right) needn’t claim that their hero is an exception, as his every utterance is drearily, predictably false and sarcastic, and thus not a whit witty.

BNality of speech is, of course, just a symptom of BNality of thought. And just as I’ve never heard an even remotely interesting remark from a BN politician or official, nor have I seen evidence of a single creative idea.

There’s been no shortage of projects, I grant you. Like the Twin Towers, for example, which have proven a big tourist attraction. But they were built by Japanese and Korean contractors using mostly Indonesian labour, and when it came to the BNality of who paid the bill, the evil fact is that the Malaysian people did, through Petronas accounts so compromised that they’re an official state secret.

So, as with every project on which the BN government spends public funds, there’s no accounting for how much loot was siphoned-off in kickbacks, ‘commissions’, fraud and embezzlement. Just as there’s no way of telling which individuals and corporations evade tax by paying bribes in return for deep discounts.


But the greatest cost of all this venality isn’t financial, it’s social. For evil of such BNality to prosper and perpepuate itself, the populace has to be deprived of such safeguards as a proper police force, honest judiciary, trustworthy media, enlightened education system and independent civil services.

Deprivations that lead in turn to rampant corruption, uncontrolled crime, ceaseless suspicious deaths in custody, growing risk of arrest and detention without charge, heavily-skewed elections and, as recently experienced by the DAP, police harrassment of opposition politicians and supporters.

As I write this, people are being arrested in Ipoh for participating in a hunger strike to protest the recent power-grab in Perak. So at least I haven’t entirely wasted this beautiful day by spending it at the keyboard.



As long as courageous activists keep on fighting and we critics keep on typing, someday the majority of Malaysians will finally revolt against the intolerable reality - not to mention the flagrant immorality and growing illegality - of BN evil and banality.

[First posted 27 May 2009]

Q W E R T Y U I O P ~ concerning a typewriter’s exploratory travels from right to left on a particular plane (written in March 1968)

Blankly I stare: Q stares blankly back at me. Gradual intensification. We coalesce. I am Q, Q me.

Everything looks different from the right where Q really is, not left as she appears to be if you aren’t Q. But

I am Q and I need you: can’t exist meaningfully without you (except in qintar, qantas, qoph and similar foreign nonconformists).

Just you I want, must have to live: but someday I hope they’ll let me marry doubleyou. Qwite understandably some will consider this the qwintessence of qwixotism; and the inevitable qwestion will spring forh qwietly in the minds of men and women alike -- ? But

why? is the pivotpoint, the center key, and by and by we shall know why; but as it is we are moving from right to left unless you aren’t Q and insist on deluding yourself that left to right is right, and right to left is wrong. (Rong and wong are wrong, only wrong is wright: argue all you want. This is an established and accepted wrule.)

The Rules say Loitering is unLawful, so we may not linger as long as we like: the longer we linger the less the likelihood of our getting to know Why. 

We have outlived ourselves, doubleyou has eloped with Q, and ere Why is known E shall demonstrate his essentiality, having been in existence for eons in every form (Official or Otherwise); typewritten or clearly printed, in blackblue, blueblack, grey, green, turquoise, turple or purpoise, but never in pencil or crayon or ballboing, nor in red nor tempera ochre (so says Officialdom or Otherwisdom)… 

but returning to the key under scrutiny, taking into account his especial elasticity; as emphatic as an elephant, as elusive as an eel, as everywhere as in eerie… The emphasis is on elusion, with particular emph on el – El being also essential though obviously on a lower level but… remember Love begins with El, and so doth Life, both of which end with, grimly, E… grit your teeth, say eeeee and easily you will see, still saying eeeee, that: elephants and eels may not be executed, never electrocuted, for eels are electric and elephants expansive (both eat and everything is edible).

The answer is no if you want to know Why immediately. We is or are very close to why?, slightly right of it, or rt. if you are an obsessive abbreviator. But

this is the truth. And soon we shall come to the truth, you and I, and oh, peace/power/purity, nothing prurient/pornographic/or picayune; but before all, to do the rt. thing we are, aren’t we, we are too. Rrrrrrright!

To reason is rong (remember, wrong: sowwy). It is wrong, it being not right to reason – ridiculous to imagine a radical radicle renouncing its right (or left) to ravish the earth! – realize, you who aren’t R, to rationalize by ratiocination is redundant and retrogressive, but you know it’s de rigueur to probe and ponder like roots that rape the radius of their rhizosphere, surrounded, alas! by truth and why? at left, and the everpresent everything and What for? When? Where? Who? Which? well, and related qwestions at right – Lord and Lady and Son and Daughter! Impossible, inconceivable, with parched throat and dehydrated tongue to rrreason rrrightly as do the Irrrish and the Iberrrians. Relent to rapture, lubricate your larynx with reasonability, for the tyme is come, I am now crucified, and presently shall know why? and Why.

Tea time, tic toc, tok tok, tick, pick pocket times pock picket equals (approximately) tock tock, tic, ticket talk talk; time is a thief. It may steal Your life before You get to know Why, so finish your tea and see Me as tee, as tyme with a why?, as truth with a you, as three crosses on calvary and a thaumaturgist aged thirtythree who was between a why? and a rogue, for I am in truth, the terminus, the turnstile before you and why? and the answer to Your qwery which, ultimately, ought to be if You’re thoughtfully thinking, what is this truth...

Like tourists who arrive in omnibuses to view the hippopotamuses in the river: three (or four or five) hippos swimming slowly upstream on their broad backs occasionally grinning for the colorful, happy tourists who make bad photographs with good cameras and tell the folks back home about the swimming/grinning/cleanshaven hippos with friendly armpits. 

And that’s the truth (they think). But the truth is there – where, don’t ask me, I’m here (at the typewriter) – don’t ask them, they’re neither there nor here nor anywhere… too much! i’ve had of totem, theology, and transistorized truth; too little! tyme with a why? to proceed to you and I, and oh, peace…

Why! why?, a man with arms held high above head, an upsidedown person in Chinese: I can’t tell you Why when I am why? but all I need is you and oh and I am not Me but You. I am a key (and even keys ask why?) and when depressed I come up with ? a coat hanger, a pearl earring, an inverted fishhook, a contortionist on a ball – don’t ask me, I am why? 

Qwery, qwery without the important truth; you and I must pray (to whom to what) or merely hope for that eventual final qwerty to end all qweries, before oh (despair/resignation), purity/perpetuity/or putrefaction marks our period –

What is left is left, the right is done with for now unless you still persistently deny that you are a key or different keys at different moments in different situations. But let me be you now: I stand apart, i separate you from perfection just as You stand stubbornly between Me and my panacea… you, imperfect ellipse, unconnected unround, uncircle, will your poles touch and discover perpetuity? 

Again the why? After all, You begin with a qwery and end with an unfulfillment; i stand between you and completion, Your incompletion bars Me from my peak. Surely, for the benefit of You, Me, and Us, we must coalesce, or at least seal the space between our keys, but how, how, how when i am a pillar and you are a You. Though I pretend to be You I cannot, will not accept You as Me, not even if you humbly dot yourself too and pronounce Yourself i. Oh, oh, oh. Close to perfection but somewhat hollow, somehow empty. Oh, oh, oh. An orphan with open orifices, an outburst of outright surprise, a long-overdue orgasm…

The Prize is precious, pregnant with promise; at tea time it seemed so near, but never, it’s impossible for Me to be protoplasm and perfection until I have mastered metempsychosis or some such perversion. Pain, pressure, pain is the only key I play at present; and I don’t play it with pride – I hate being a pawn, prawns keep asking why? as they are shelled, masticated, and digested; prawns just don’t have It. Neither do I, who knows about You. I hope You do (know, I mean).

Pelagius was no pessimist, optimism was his peduncle (rhymes with carbuncle): I wonder if he drowned. No, let’s not wonder; that would take us back to doubleyou, rrright back to What for? When? Where? Who? Which? well, and related qwestions. And everybody is much too weary by now (I hope). So from oh I gaze longingly at peace, plenty, pleasure, purity, permanence, and other paradisiacal platypus eggs.

Many things unaccomplished, sixteen more lives to lead, all on lower levels, different planes. Planes, planes: that is significant. Up, down, below, above, toward, away, play with planes or let them play with You and Me and Everybody. But 

that is another story.

...............................................................................................................

Please, Mr Marrel, release me now and I shall travel to the end of the page

Termite-eaten remains of the original typewritten homework submitted to 

Joseph F. Martino Jr, creative writing teacher at West Essex High School, 

New Jersey, in March 1968

Can Anwar become Prime Minister in the next few weeks? (posted 16 March 2008)

This is how my former son-in-law Marcus responded to an article I circulated with the headline "Can Anwar become Prime Minister in the next few weeks?":

You must be joking. He comes from the same breed and is just a lamp (sic) in a wolfs outfit. Hope u are not serious.

I am absolutely serious, Marcus. There has been a systematic attempt to undermine Anwar's credibility by those who recognize that he is indeed the most intelligent, adaptable, and charismatic leader to emerge from Umno's ranks. Mahathir's vicious attack on him which led to Anwar's 6 years of humiliation, imprisonment and intense suffering was the furnace that remolded the man into a prime ministerial candidate that I personally endorse. I have no fear of Anwar Ibrahim and am pleased to have him (as well as Lim Kit Siang) as Facebook friends :-)

An important factor people who irrationally hate and fear Anwar seem to have forgotten is that PKR is no longer just Anwar Ibrahim. He is surrounded by many good people who will immediately quit PKR if ever Anwar's dark side begins to reassert itself and turns him into a monster. Anyway, having survived and outlived the Greatest Monster of Them All (yes, I mean Mahathir) we can deal with any wannabe Monsters that show up!

Having met Wan Azizah and Nurul Izzah during the Reformasi days, I have no doubt that they are very fine people and will always have a moderating effect on Anwar.

Since September 2, 1998, the day Anwar Ibrahim was fired, I have been monitoring the man closely and his every move and utterance has impressed me favorably.

We are living in a whole new era now, Marcus. All those who have spoken negatively about Anwar Ibrahim can only warn about his ambition and lust for power - and they say he was just like the other Umno politicians before he got sacked. Anwar Ibrahim WANTS to be PM. He has always said so. He was, in fact, next in line for the job before September 1998, having been groomed by Dr M for 16 years. Nobody can say the PKR has no experience governing. I have no quarrel with people who are ambitious - so long as they have what it takes to be at the top, and what it takes is a willingness to learn from their own mistakes and to keep their minds open to feedback from others. The recent elections was largely won through a free flow of information via the blogs and news portals like Malaysiakini.

If Anwar becomes PM and starts regressing into authoritarianism he will hear about it immediately. In any case, I will personally hold him accountable to his pre-election promise of abolishing all repressive laws (ISA, OSA, etc). Once those laws are gone, the mechanisms by which citizens can keep their elected leaders in check will be restored.

Your nervousness probably comes from the views of so-called experts who move in power circles. They all suffer from the same disease: hero-envy! They are secretly envious of Anwar because he has the capacity to reinvent himself - from victim to victor within 10 years. Remember those images of Anwar from early 1999, with black eye, frogmarched around by policemen, in constant pain from a spinal injury, attending his mother's funeral in a wheelchair, not allowed to seek medical treatment in Germany... slowly poisoned by arsenic mixed into the paintwork of his Sungai Buloh cell. Look at him today. I for one am very impressed and will publicly name him a national hero. He showed Malaysians you can defy Mahathir - and live!

Cheers & Hugs,
Antares
~^@^~

P.S. In any case, there isn't anybody from Umno who qualifies as PM. Certainly not Najib, the urbane sleazeball with blood on his hands and Lady Macbeth on his back! Hishamuddin is a braindead lout and Khairy J is definitely the most hated Malay in Malaysia (people believe he had to cheat to win in Rembau). All the old farts are out - and none of the newer faces has a personality or even a known opinion outside of Umno party dogma, viz., the Malays need Umno to defend their special rights. No PAS leader is acceptable as PM - not yet - because they are too closely aligned with a religion. The DAP leaders may be sincere for the most part but many are from the ranks of hawkers and sundry shop owners - a bit uncouth and unsophisticated when it comes to dancing with the complex Malay psyche. This leaves PKR - the first workable multi-ethnic party in Malaysian history - and I'm extremely pleased Selangor is now managed by PKR. No, I am not a card-carrying member - though in 1999 I paid my RM2 to join KeADILan in KKB. Unfortunately the schoolteacher who was acting as treasurer absconded with all the money collected and later rejoined Umno - so I was never registered! 

[Correction: my application was approved nevertheless and I subsequently received a certificate of membership.]

Antares
Magick River
44000 Kuala Kubu Baru
Malaysia

DEPRESSION (revisited)

Subject: World-Action...... DEPRESSION
Date: Wed, 31 May 2000
From: "World-Action"

Someone who does a HUGE amount to help the world has just written to me telling me how depressed they get. I have replied saying I get very depressed too. Last weekend several hundred World-Action e-mails of various types were zooming all over the world. My feeling was that these e-mails contained significant information and inspiration. In fact, very important information and inspiration. Out of a possible 1,000+ people who read them, I received about four good responses. Quite frankly I feel depressed. Depressed because myself and Rory Winter put a lot of effort into sending these mailings about. And depressed because I am very concerned about the state of the world and I felt these ideas were important. Now, I am wondering if others feel depressed too. Do YOU feel overwhelmed by the world situation?

CLIP

Best wishes,
Michael
World-Action and Rainbow Dream Vision
http://www.world-action.com

MY GOOD FRIEND ANTARES FROM MALAYSIA WROTE:

Date: Wed, 31 May 2000
From: Antares
Subject: DEPRESSION (The Rainbow Dream Vision Revisited)

Dear Michael,

Of course we're all depressed, even I the Eternal Optimist, or we'd be zombies. The only ones who aren't depressed right now are either zombies or Zombie Masters (the ones who increase their own power by turning others into remote-control zombies!) Someone I loved through and through turned into a zombie after the Grand Stellium... the hologram of heaven on earth, Magick River, is now a giant construction site... the tribe I married into has become hysterical and retreated into alcoholism and xenophobia... those who threaten the political status quo in Malaysia are still languishing in jail with zero hope of justice because all the honorable judges have been fired or retired... while the zombie-in-the-street continues to worry about "the next meal" and "the next pay rise" and "what the neighbors are going to say."

MY FRIENDS, WELCOME TO WORLD WAR THREE!!!

The battleground is your psyche. The weapons are ideologies, misconceptions, and constrictive thoughtforms. The enemy is invisible and lurks in Inner Space... is, in fact, your own hardwired circuitry, your tampered-with genomes, whatever makes you prone to depression, self-pity, and despair. 

I recommend that everyone re-read THE MIND PARASITES and PHILOSOPHER'S STONE by Colin Wilson (1968/1969): he foresaw that the Greatest Danger facing Humanity was an enemy that existed only in our wildest paranoid anxieties - but could so easily demoralize the visionary in each of us to the extent that we collapse, like Winston Smith, into an even deeper level of apathy and numbness, content to watch the screen (whether telly, laptop or smartphone) and sip our Victory gin...

How do we fight back??? What use is Shadow Boxing??? Can we possibly hope to destroy Evil forever??? Has the Dark Brotherhood emerged the victor in the aeons-old battle between Light and Dark???

Take it easy, Michael... take it easy, Dear People... take it easy, Antares! Lao-tse, my once and future favorite sage, always advised: "If you don't know what to do, do nothing."

Doing nothing is not apathy. It is the passive phase of a cycle that includes activity and festivity. We have been very active for several centuries... or at least decades. The seeds we planted and sowed on our journey are now germinating, but the seedlings are very tender yet. The Shadow of Nothingness fears Oblivion and will do Everything Possible to delay or thwart the inevitable paradigm shift, the quantum jump, the ascension of Lady Gaia, the New Golden Dawn. We must allow it to exhaust itself, while responding instinctively, like veteran tennis players, to the to-and-froing of our mental focus.


Meanwhile, the apocalyptic horrors will pile up around us. Let them. Just keep the Inner Light glowing within, remember we are Perfect Holograms of the One, of All That Is, and that means the Darkness, the Evil, the Disease are all within us too. They are the outward manifestations of our collective petty ego fears and jealousies. The shadow self that feels shame and guilt and profound unworthiness - that could buy an unlikely story like Original Sin - the traumatized inner child programmed to believe it will never be good until it has become Rich and Famous!

Yes, Michael, I am indeed troubled by the swift change in polarity that happened in the last two years: since June 1998 positive trends have turned negative. A powerful sign was the lack of funding interest in Jean Hudon's Earth Rainbow Concert 2000 Project. Now I ask myself: have I not experienced exactly the same sort of disappointment with my own visionary schemes? And is disappointment not due to expectation? But is it possible not to expect? Not to hope? Not to desire? Not to visualize a new heaven on a new earth?

We have to continue anticipating, desiring, hoping, visualizing. But we must let go of the outcome. We must surrender that to the Supreme Indifference of the Void. For that is indeed our Briar Patch - whence all Being originated, that Infinite Potentiality out of which the Finite Universe actualized itself. Whether we win or lose or draw... it's just another Cosmic Poker Game. True, this time the stakes are incredibly high. But whether you're playing in rand or rupiah, euro or US dollar, it's just Monopoly money!

Undaunted & Undeterred,
Antares

[First posted 3 December 2006, reposted 5 February 2018]

Passing Wind & The Paranormal Music Society ~ featuring Linsey Pollak @ Professor Squealy Deetbum! (reprise)

One of the most amazing artists I had the privilege of bumping into in 1991 on my first visit to Australia (sponsored by the Department of Cultural Affairs) was a muso named Linsey Pollak, who happened to be creating some music for Doppio Teatro (a trilingual touring theatre company founded by Teresa Crea) .

I knew he was amazing within minutes of our meeting. How so? I showed him my Balinese flutes and he tried one out and instantly was able to coax the sweetest sounds out of it. At the time I didn't know Linsey could coax sweet sounds out of garden hoses and broomsticks. Linsey gave me a cassette his group - the Paranormal Music Society - had recently released, which featured Linsey playing, among other odd instruments, the kitchen sink and a rubber glove gaida (a miniature bagpipe made from a surgical glove - that's right, another Pollak invention).

Twenty-one years later, I chance upon Linsey Pollak yet again - this time on YouTube. Actually, I was looking for some inspiring music to feature on this blog and did a search for the Paranormals. The original band seems to have disappeared - but Linsey Pollak is just as amazing and musically alive as ever, perhaps even more so. Indeed, I regard this unassuming genius as one of the most masterful musicians I have ever been inspired by. Linsey Pollak certainly gives Didier Malherbe (wind instrumentalist with Gong) and Jan Garbarek a jolly good run for their money... and he's a damn lot funnier!



The Paranormal Music Society consisted of: Professor Crivici (Romano Crivici) on keys and violin; Frank Brutal (Blair Greenberg) on percussion and guitar; and Denis Bland (Linsey Pollak) on winds (of many persuasions). The Paranormals (as they were fondly called) had a cult following in Sydney and were known for channeling the works of dead composers (especially Hidegarde Spumoni, a lesser known Baroque composer) and playing music whose notes were determined by rolls of a giant dice. They improvised requests called out by the audience. Things like: the pinnacle guinea pig races, haddock, Bob Marley goes to Turkey, Rawhide and so on. They recorded two albums (but only released one, Moving On), They were a legend in their own time.



Devised by Linsey, Out of the Frying Pan was commissioned by The Out of The Box Festival in Brisbane, directed by Chris Willems and produced by Performing Lines. It created music from house and garden objects with a cast of musician/actors that included Ceri McCoy, Jorge Rico, Penny Glass, Kari and Linsey. It was a show for 3-8 year olds that created music from bottles, glasses, brooms, mops, chairs, a ladder, rubbish bins, a garden fork, an ironing board, a carrot, inflatable trousers, a hammer, a kettle, a pumpkin, etc, etc.





The Art of Food ~ solo show (1999-2002) directed by Mark Bromilow 

Ivan is a home-styled kitchen-hand with a difference. He's eccentric, hilarious and totally irresistible. And he lives in a musical world where anything is possible. From the moment Ivan walks into the kitchen, everything becomes musical: carrots, potatoes, satay sticks, meat cleavers, and even an electric drill, with which he transforms a carrot into a clarinet before our very eyes. This musical world that Ivan creates is more than a series of clever tricks. It is an aural world of depth, energy and beauty. Although the materials are disconcertingly simple, the music itself is complex, rich and emotive, ranging from energetic and percussive cross-rhythms to haunting and lyrical woodwind (or should we say vegiewind) melodies. As with his previous solo show, Knocking on Kevin's Door, Linsey uses digital technology to record sounds instantaneously so that the audience is able to see each piece being constructed layer by layer, but in this show all the sounds come from the cooking utensils and the food. The Art of Food is an aural feast, an ode to the music of everyday life, which is there for everyone who cares to open their ears.



Linsey live loops voice percussion and melodica, soloing with Rubber Glove bagpipe, Chinese bamboo flute, and kaossilator. From his solo show, Live & Loopy.



Linsey loops balloon, kaossilator and vocals, using TC Helicon VoiceLive Touch.



This piece called "Ghosting 13" (in 13/8) is from Linsey's solo show, Live & Loopy. It features the saxillo and carrot clarinet. Linsey live loops vocal percussion, bubble wrap drum, melodica and kaossilator, with solos on saxillo (a wooden soprano sax-like instrument designed and made by Linsey) plus a carrot clarinet.



Linsey Pollak drills out a carrot and turns it into a clarinet and plays it, live looping with a Boss RC20 to record 3 layers. From his solo show, Making Jam.



How to make a carrot clarinet:
overall length of carrot is 187mm
bore: 12mm. (I use a spade bit)
6 fingerholes and thumbhole are all 7mm diameter
thumbhole is 22mm from top of carrot
fingerholes are: 39mm, 54mm, 74mm, 97mm, 123mm,140mm from top of carrot
I use an alto sax mouthpiece (Yamaha 4C used in this video)
The mouthpiece is connected to the carrot with a 12mm OD tube 35mm long. (Use electrical tape to increase diameter to suit mouthpiece). Bottom of mouthpiece is at top of carrot. This design is by Linsey Pollak and has been developed since 1995.



Linsey Pollak plays "Mr Curly" (a contra bass clarinet made from garden hose) - from his show, Passing Wind, as well as the feather duster clarinet.



Linsey Pollak live loops watering can clarinet - from his solo show, Live & Loopy.



Professor Squealy Deetbum (aka Linsey Pollak) plays the Harmonic Handlebar from his solo show CYCOLOGY.



Professor Squealy Deetbum (aka Linsey Pollak) plays the bicycle seat clarinet...



Professor Squealy Deetbum (aka Linsey Pollak) plays the spokes, frame and gear cable...



Professor Squealy Deetbum (aka Linsey Pollak) plays the bicycle and accessories in the Finale from his solo show, CYCOLOGY.



Two condoms are used (one inside the other) to create the bag for this bagpipe. The chanter and drone are aluminium tubes with a membrane reed at the top of each.

[First posted 14 May 2012, reposted 3 March 2014 & 14 March 2018]

Hypocrisy keeps the Status Quo static... (repost)

A few years ago I received an invitation to what was billed as "a global conference on Enhancing Philanthropy in Challenging Times." Hmmm.... that's intriguing, I thought. The idea of encouraging corporations to give back more to the community during a financial meltdown is certainly refreshing...


Then I read in the next line that the conference would be officially launched by the Crime Minister of Malaysia.

The third line boasted "a host of international speakers, including the wife of the PM."

Pukimak! That did it. I almost retched on my keyboard!


As if that wasn't sickening enough, the conference was going to be officially closed by the spineless minister of national unity, Koh Tsu Koon!

I immediately shot off a response to the perfectly respectable gentleman who had sent me the invite:

"No collaboration with the Irredeemably Corrupt, Greedy & Murderously Wicked!"

Almost instantly I received a reply: "Thanks for your frank and realistic comments. The challenge is how to manage the wicked to do some good... can we con them too or get caught by them?"

Well, at least my friend didn't attempt to deny or dispute the fact that the conference had invited, for the sake of political correctness and expediency, some notably wicked people to officiate. In any case, I felt it was my moral duty to elaborate on my visceral response to receiving such an invitation to participate in the philantrophic conference (for only RM900), so I wrote the following clarification, which I post here for the public record:

Anyone who publicly or privately endorses the crime ministership of Najib Tun Razak and Rosmah Mansor is tacitly expressing complicity with Umno/BN's abysmal track record on issues of justice, human rights and abuse of power.

Just as lending support to tyrants like Robert Mugabe, Dick Cheney, George W. Bush is tantamount to acquiescing with oppressive laws that allow the state to detain dissidents without due process, inflict torture on those suspected of political or religious heresy, and manipulate the mass media so that the public remains unaware of the colossal crimes committed by those in high office.

Corporations "play footsie" with such degenerate entities because they themselves are degenerate and hypocritical and are almost indistinguishable from their counterparts in politics. That's why there is a revolving door that facilitates a smooth exchange of personnel between big business and government; and that's exactly what keeps the nightmare carousel of human suffering going around and around seemingly without end.

However, the end is undoubtedly nigh for this despicable kind of self-serving "pragmatism" - all for the sake of an extra buck. This kind of cynical self-justification is what characterized the Pharisees and Sadducees in Judea. We seem to have learned nothing and made no spiritual progress after 2,000 years! 

Nevertheless, the moment these archcriminals resign from office or publicly demonstrate remorse for their gross transgressions, I am of the opinion that they be should be offered the opportunity to restore their "good standing" in society by returning at least 80% of their ill-gotten gains to the national treasury and accepting that they are henceforth disqualified from wielding political power. No need for lynch mobs and lifelong incarceration.

I absolutely do not agree that you can cooperate with them in any positive or wholesome way - just as it would be suicidal for PAS or Pakatan Rakyat to form a political alliance with the ravenous and morally depraved Umno which deserves to exist henceforth only in cultural museums as an instructive relic of the Kali yuga.

Those of you who profess to be Christians: quit playing the role of Pharisees, Sadducees and Scribes for whom the Bottom Line is all that matters! Whose side are you on anyway? Yeshua the Reformer... or The Corrupt and Evil Establishment?


How will things ever improve if you keep smiling for the camera and shaking the Sheriff of Nottingham's pudgy hand to clinch a couple of lucrative contracts... while secretly applauding and rooting for Robin Hood?

[First posted 19 June 2009, reposted 4 April 2017 & 28 November 2017]